随机翻取第一部第16章 It was evening,and the grey light was again waning fast, when they halted for the night. They were very weary. The mountains were veiled in deepening dusk, and the wind was cold. 朱:傍晚时分,灰色的落日残光快速地消退,一行人暂时停下脚步,等待黑夜降临。他们身心俱疲,山脉遮盖在渐渐降临的暮色之中,风又强又冷。 邓:黄昏来临,暗淡的天光正在迅速消失,一行人疲倦不堪,停下来准备过夜。群山笼罩在深沉的暮色中,寒风凛冽。 比较:wind was cold朱版增译,其它差不多
随机翻取第一部第21章 “It wasn't funny that way, Mr. Frodo. It was queer. All wrong, if it wasn't a dream. And you had best hear it. It was like this: I saw a log with eyes!” 朱:“不是那种好笑啦,佛罗多先生,我应该说是诡异才对。一切都不对劲,又不太像是作梦,你最好听我说。我看到的是长了眼睛的浮木!” 邓:“不是那种滑稽,弗罗多先生,是很古怪。那要不是梦的话,可就不对头了。你最好听听看。是这样的:我看见一截木头长了眼睛!” 比较:All wrong, if it wasn't a dream。朱版翻译成“一切都不对劲,又不太像是作梦”,邓版是“那要不是梦的话,可就不对头了”,感觉邓版更加直译。朱版加语气词“啦”,文风让人感觉活泼,邓版的感觉庄重。
随机翻取第二部第5章 Legolas Greenleaf long under tree In joy thou hastlived. Beware of the Sea! If thou hearestthe cry of the gull on the shore, Thy heart shallthen rest in the forest no more. 朱:勒苟拉斯,绿叶在树下已经历许久 汝已度过快乐的时光,但务需注意那大海不朽! 若汝听见岸边的海鸥鸣叫, 汝之心将不再甘于被森林围绕。 邓:绿叶莱戈拉斯,徜徉林下久矣。 汝生长于欢乐,须措意于大海! 若闻海岸沙鸥鸣啼, 汝心再难安歇林下。 比较:朱版把莱格拉斯的全名拆开,把绿叶当做真正的绿叶错译了!= =
随机翻取第二部第11章 The road passed slowly, winding down the valley. Now further, and now nearer Isen flowed in its stony bed. 朱:他们停了下来。稍后离开了大路,走上斜坡。道路蜿蜒地往谷外伸去,经过一番跋涉,众人来到了靠近艾辛河的地方。 邓:他们缓缓行去,迤逦穿过山谷,脚下的路距离淌过石头河床的艾森河忽近忽远。 比较:这个一看就知道,邓版的准确度明显高于朱版。且朱版有增译
随机翻取第二部第17章 'Boromir, OBoromir!' he cried. 'What did she say to you, the Lady that dies not? What did she see? What woke in your heart then? Why went you ever to Laurelindurenan,and came not by your own road, upon the horses of Rohan riding home in the morning?' 朱:“波罗莫!喔,波罗莫!”他大喊着。“那不死的女王,她究竟对你说了些什么?她看见了什么?你的心中想起了什么?你为什么要去罗伦林多瑞安,却不照着你之前的计划,骑着洛汗的骏马回到家乡?” 邓:“波洛米尔,噢,波洛米尔!”他叹道,“那位永生不死的夫人,她对你说了什么?她看见了什么?那时有什么从你心中苏醒?你究竟为何要去劳瑞林多瑞南?为什么不走你自己的路,骑着洛汗的骏马在清晨回到家乡?” 比较:in the morning朱版漏译。“他大喊着”和“他叹道”,个人倾向邓版译法
随机翻取第一部第3章 The sun went down. Bag End seemed sad and gloomy and dishevelled. Frodo wandered round the familiar rooms, and saw the light of the sunset fade on the walls, and shadow screep out of the corners. It grew slowly dark indoors. 朱:太阳下山了。袋底洞看起来十分的孤单忧郁和空旷。佛罗多在熟悉的房间内漫步,看着落日的余晖渐渐隐去,阴影慢慢将房内包围。室内开始变暗。 邓:太阳下山了。袋底洞显得悲伤,忧郁,凌乱不堪。弗罗多在一个个熟悉的房间中徜徉,看着墙上夕阳的余晖逐渐消失,阴影逐渐从屋角蔓延开来。室内渐渐暗了下来。 比较:朱版的dishevelled错译,on the walls漏译。shadow screep out of the corners的翻译邓版更加精确雅致。
又从第三部中随便挑了两段贴出来 第三部第2章 “Oathbreakers, why have ye come?” And a voice washeard out of the night answered him, as if from far away” “To fulfil ouroath and have peace” 朱:“毁诺者们,你们为何前来?” 一个彷佛从远方传来的声音穿透夜色,回答了他: “为了实现我们的誓言,获得安息的权利。” 邓:“背誓者,你们为何而来?” 黑夜中但听一个仿佛自远方传来的声音回答他说: “为了履行我们的誓言,以求安息。“ 比较:背誓者和毁诺者,个人觉得背誓者更加凌厉。以求安息相比获得安息的权利,以求安息更加符合中文的表达习惯
第三部第3章 Day was waning. In the last rays of the sun the Riders cast long pointed shadows that went on before them. Darkness had already crept beneath the murmuring fir-woods that clothed the steep mountain-sides. 朱:太阳正渐渐消逝,骠骑们在最后一丝阳光中疾行,身体往前投射出长长的阴影。黑暗已经将山脚边的松林全都吞没 邓:白昼将尽。夕阳的余晖让骑兵们身前投出了狭长的影子。夜色已经在覆盖着陡峭山坡、沙沙作响的冷杉林下悄悄蔓延开来 比较:朱版增译“疾行”,before them:身前译成了身体往前,murmuring、steep漏译