I was going to post an article that I had written last year about how Valentine's Day serves as a reminder to singles that they're still without their "plus one" (as Carrie Bradshaw from Sex & the City would put it), and as the annual opportunity for advertisers to come up with more clever marketing.
But I'm sick of it. Sick of myself and my passive-aggressive cynical, sarcastic, border-line grassroots "let's-bust out the placards and condone businesses and couples who celebrate V-Day because I'm Bridget Jones again this year" BS.
Valentine's Day dates back to God knows when B.C but I think it's in celebration or dedication to a priest that would marry off star-crossed lovers, despite the risks in doing so. There are three versions to the story and I think some guy named Claudius is also involved, but since I can't remember, I'm not gonna pretend to be Robert Langdon history major here and try to sound smart.
Ok so there's my two-cents on the origin of the holiday: A rebel priest who defied the rules of whatever Chirch he was part of to wed couples who weren't allowed to get married, all for the sake of L_O_V_E (that poppy Elva song is ringing in my head right now).
I was at the hospital by work the other day, Feb 13th BJT. As I got into the elevator going down, I noticed this elderly couple, well into their late 70's early-mid 80's maybe. The man was gripping onto the handle bars of the wheelchair his wife was sitting in. Both were bundled up quite snug in their winter coats. There was a gentleness in the way he slowly moved her chair into the elevator. The way he spoke to her. They were talking about how many boxes of meds they should get from the doctor. Nothing special, but it was the pure simplicity of it, that casual exchange of deliberation between two people that you know were once young and vital (and probably had some crazy memories in their youth together) that made me think about love and how time cannot touch what is unconditional.
It melted my heart just watching them. Through sickness and health. They have each other. I could feel the love, and I'm sure the woman pushing the buttons in the elevator felt it too.
When we're young, we often place importance on things which matter the least. If you're anything like me, then you've probably made lists of qualities you want in your significant other, right down to height, diameter of shoulders and choice of cologne!
But that is NOT real.
When you're well into the Golden years of retirement is it really gonna matter that your hubby no longer has buns of steel or that your darling wife has "creeping crepe neck syndrome"? (as Jan Wong once described Suzanne Somers...ouch!. Love is an absolute truth. It doesn't change and cannot be based on superficial temporary things, like a checklist devoid of endearing qualities. That being said,
physical appearance is a tough one to "Liu Xiang" over (hurdle over, if you didn't get that cheesy play on words). Appearance is tied to attraction, and initially, it is a physical thing. But substance and good conversation goes a much longer way.
Here are the Lyrics to Adam Sandler's song from The Wedding Singer.
Dedicted to all you hopeful romantics out there who are looking for "someone to grow old with"
I wanna make you smile whenever youre sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is grow old with you
Ill get your medicine when your tummy aches
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks
Oh it could be so nice, growing old with you
Ill miss you
Ill kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold
Ill need you
Ill feed you
Even let ya hold the remote control
So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed if youve had too much to drink
I could be the man who grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you...