2,
I awoke much later than usual, rushed into my clothes and dashed
to the theatre. As I went into the rehearsal room, where they
were waiting for me, I was so embarrassed that instead of
apology I made the careless remark, "I seem to be a little
late."Rakhmanov, the Assistant Director, looked at me a long
time reproachfully, and finally said:
"We have been sitting here waiting, our nerves on edge, angry,
and 'it seems I am a little late.' We all came here full of
enthusiasm for the work waiting to be done, and now, thanks
to you, that mood has been destroyed. To arouse a desire to
create is difficult; to kill that desire is extremely easy.
If I interfere with my own work, it is my own affair, but what
right hav I to hold up the work of a whole group? The actor,
no less than the soldier, must be subject to iron discipline."
For this first offence Rakhmanov said he would limit himself to
a reprimand, and not enter it on the written record kept of
students, but that I must apologize immediately to all, and make
it a rule in the future to appear it rehearsals a quarter of
an hour before they begin. Even after my apology Rakhmanov was
unwilling to go on, because he said the first rehearsal is an
event in an artist's life, and he should retain the best
possible impression of it. Today's rehearsal was spoiled by my
carelessness; let us hope that tomorrow's will be memorable.