食堂菜是我国第九大菜系、广泛分布 于全国各地、主要烹饪方法有瞎特么炒、 乱特么炖……主要特色以不放肉、不放油 而闻名全国！

与哥们喝闷酒聊天，谈恋爱，“恋爱一次失败一次，恋爱一次失败一次，真TM羡慕你。。。”“我怎么了？”“恋爱一次成功一次，恋爱一次成功一次。。。”“这TM有区别么？”

When I was little, my friend and I were talking about street lights. He said red means stop, green means go, and yellow means speed up. I said no, yellow means SLOW DOWN. He said "but why does my dad always speed up when he sees a yellow light?" we were both perplexed.

啊，主银，你要干什么？你放过我吧……

有一个北方朋友来成都第一次去吃四川火锅，由于只吃过东来顺之类的北方涮羊肉，看到桌子上的香油蒜泥调料，就叫来服务员问“有麻酱吗？”服务员操着纯正的四川话说：“不得，有扑克你要不嘛。”